Founded as Stoke Ramblers in 1863, the club's players would perambulate across the moors and National Trust properties until they were granted ciity status in 1925 when they changed their name to Stoke City. The Ramblers were established by Henry Almond, an apprentice with the North Staffordshire Railway Company, who apponted himself captain and scored the only goal in their opening match against a scratch team of assorted walnuts, peanuts and chestnuts.
Along with the recently battered Blackburn Rovers, Decimated Derby County and the Priest Town Invincibles, Stoke share the honour of being one of the twelve founding members of the Football Leauge in 1888. Since those auspicious beginnings, Stoke have boomeranged up and down the leagues, in and out of liquidation, more often than TC's private parts on a bouncy castle.
Stoke are nicknamed the Potters after successive generations of wizards plied their wands acoss Stafforshire's historic potteries. After watchinig copious amounts of pirate movies, the club decided to wear red and white striped shirts and adopted the song Delilah in lieu of being cuckolded by voluptuous, treacherous women.
Their most celebrated player was the Arthurian Knight, Sir Hanley Matthews who grew up in Stanley and like the aforementioned Potters was reknowned for being a wizard and a magician. Against all odds, the Potters achieved top flight status, led by a management team of Waddington's Playing Cards. Under Ace Potter, Waddington, they won the Football League Cup in 1972, reached two FA Cup Semi Finals and could well have won the Division One Trophy had the Butler Street Stand roof not fallen off in a strong storm.
Famous celebrities from Stoke include:
Football hooligan, Mark Chester
Robbie Williams
Slash
Lemmy
Captain Edwad Smith who sank the Titanic
Phil The Power Taylor
Bruno Brookes
Neil Morrissey
Ted Hankey
Nick Hancock
Garth Crooks
Sir Hanley Matthews
Harry Potter
Various Potters
Sir Douglas "Tin Legs" Bader
Stoke are on to their third manager of the seasion and are currently helmed by Narcís Pèlach known as Chicho after one of the Marx Brothers. They currently sit 19th in the table and we are second. Their current streak is D L L L D L and ours is W L W W D W . Their star player is Million Manhoef who has hoofed a million men. Their top goalscorer this year is Tommy Cannon, one half of comic double act Cannon and Ball. I predict 3-0 win to our boys with goals from James, Joseph and Bogle.
Another win mate although a crap watch the fog made me wonder if there was a ball in play still we are top of the league