Watford v Leeds

Back to life, back to reality, back to the hear and now, back to the championship after the mauling malaise at Millwall in this year's FA Cup exit. Watford, in old English, meaning "Waet" (Full of water) or "Wath" (hunting) and ford (meaning ford). Watford was first mentioned in an Anglo charter for 1007 AD so it's super old. It's also the home to Warner Borthers Studios wher Harry Potter was filmed so it's magic. Indeed the interior of Watford Town Hall frequently doubles up as a location for courtroom dramas, so the jury's out. If you like your roundabouts, it's heaven. The Old Ground pub is haunted, so perfect for spirits. Star Wars and the Sound of Music were filmed there. The first banana sold in Britain was sold in Watford market. And who couldn't love a town with streets named Whippendell Road and Hagden Lane. More importantly, it's the town that tourists frequently confuse with the Watford Gap Service on the M1 which is 67 miles away in Northamptonshire, near Coventry.

As for Watord FC, it was formed in 1881 so it's super old. The club was established by Harry Glover, brother of gruff actor Brian Glover who starred in an American Werefolf in London - the one where Jenny Agutter gets undressed. Harry went on to play for the club as a Full Back. At its inception, Watford FC was named West Hertfordshire and was comprised entirely of amateur players. West Hertforshire would merge with Watford St Marys in 1898 and become the Watford FC that we all love today. In 1896, it joined the Southern League and did sweet FA until Rocket Man, Elton John, was installed as chairman in 1976. The following year, Rocket Man appointed Potato Head, Graham Taylor as manager and history was made. The club rocketed up the leagues and started the 1982-83 season with four wins and was top of the league and indeed the world. They reached the FA Cup final in 1984 when they lost to Howard Kendall's all conquering Everton. That was the era of John Barmes. Luther Blissett, Steve Sherwood, Kenny Jackett, and Big Mo Johnson. Since then, they've done sweet FA.

Watford used to walk out to the theme tune of Z Cars as that was manager Bill McGarry's favourite tv show, but was a bit naff as that's the tune Everton walk out to. Nowadays, they walk out to Elton John's "Im still standing" whilst the crowd remain seated. Initially, Watford were nicknamed 'The Brewers' in reference to the Benskins Brewery who sponsored the purchase of their home ground, Vicarage Road. The team are now nicknamed 'The Hornets', on account of their yellow and black attire which was introduced in 1959-60.

Watford's mascot is Harry the Hornet and he's a pain in the backside. Harry made headlines when he attempted to emulate Crystal Palace's Wilfred Zaha's dive which earned him a yellow card and the ire of manager, Roy Hodgson, who when interviewed told us candidly that "Zaha does not dive". "If you're asking me whether Harry the Hornet, who I presume is the mascot, should dive in that way, I think it's disgraceful, because that's not what football matches are about." said Hodgson.

"And certainly if it's provoking the crowd into looking for something that's not there, it should be stopped." Not to be overlooked, former Palace boss and future Leeds manager, Sam Allardyce said Harry the Hornet was "out of" order". Harry didn't learn his lesson and repeated the feat in 2018 with a head first sliding tackle. He finally got his just desserts when he was served a banoffee pie.

The Italian Pozzo family aquired Watford in 2012 from Laurence Bassini for the princely sum of £440,000. Since then, they have sacked 19 managers, so current incumbent, Tom Cleverly, since April 2024, will probably get the boot when we cuff them on Tuesday. Watford were fined £4.3m by the Sweet English FA when it was discovered a forged letter had been submitted during Gino Pozzo's takeover. But I say, Don't go breaking my heart.

Famous celebs from Watford include:

• Terry Scott

• Robert Glenister

• Vinnie Jones

• Mo Mowlam

• Geri Spice Haliwell

• Bradley Walsh

• Gareth Southgate

• Anthony Joshua

• Mary Portis

• Super Ace Pilot, Air Vice Marshal Robert Bateson who commanded No 613 City of Manchester RAF and was awarded a bar to his Distinguished Service Medal.

In terms of current form, Watford are 10th with WLLLD and we are top with WWDWW. Players to look out for include former Leeds Utd academy player Mattie Pollock at CB; veteran French international Mousssa Sisisko on the right wing; Moroccan international midfieder, Imran Louza; Democratic Republic of Congo's attacking midfielder Edo Kayember; striker, Vakoun Bayo nicknamed The Crow; and Algerian international LB, Yasser Larouci. Blimey, they aren't a walkover and shouldn't be taken for granted. However we are no candle in the wind, despite the Millwall defeat. Our best XI will be on the pitch on Tuesday, rested and willing. I predict a close game, but we will endure and finish 1-0, goal from Dan the Man James.